Dear Leader personally scores against Brasil!

Brazil v. North Korea yesterday was considered the biggest mismatch of the world cup, so it was good to see the underdogs score at least one goal. In celebration, here's one of their finest patriotic songs (& this video has good english subtitles & North Korean images.)

Brazil's two are followed by North Korea's unlikely goal:

The Tale of Big Toothie

The Tale of Big Toothie
Comprised of Five Word Poems by Minnie Molly Mary
Photo-journalism by David Magnolia Ficke
Sangria provided by S. Sandrigon
And a Special Appearance by Darren Southworth Peoples as the outlaw Rocky "Antibiotic-Resistant" Goner-realism
Five Nights Only!
Free Hair Tonic & Cold Sore Eradication thrown in for parties of five or more.

The Tale of Big Toothie
Part I.

big toothie was a thug

he resembled a good-looking dolphin

both parents were feral mathematicians

big toothie always wore white

especially with tooth-fairy on sunday's

they would jump chain-link fences

tooth-fairy laughed at big toothie

big toothie shook his fist

"i'll get you my pretty!....

if the jellyfish don't first"

Part II.

big toothie threatened death often

fortunately the jellyfish never obliged

child services watched them constantly

Part III.

big toothie rocked the party

oftentimes his bow-tie strangled him

instead of crying he choked

this he did not like

big toothie has low tolerance

"off with this accoutrement immediately,

bow-tie's disturb the chest halo...

and this little shirt, too!"

teeth have nipples, everyone wondered?

"what do they taste like?"

tooth-fairy raised her hand first

"they taste like vegan haggis!"

Part IV.

big toothie wanted to murder her

he was a reasonable tooth

conversely, pixies were riotous cheerleaders

tooth-fairy's parents sported grog blossoms

mother wore christmas ass-less chaps

father was a rhinestone cowboy

Part V.

big toothie got a cavity

"curses to all the truffles....

beastie evil fairy perversed me

tooth fairy's had rich taste

"screw dental hygiene" says she

"WELL, it's MY calcium appendage!"

fairy's liked corrupting god's gifts

afflicted, big toothie played dead

unfortunately, sleeping gives cavities strength

being an alcoholic doesn't help

"an inevitable dr. death visit!"

Part VI.

doctor's office smelled of warthogs

dr. death wore air jordan's

his parents were tight rope hula-hoopers

his handlebar moustache was frosted

sadly the prognosis was negative

"this chunk here must go!"

(speaking of the right nipple)

"refusal would mean impending gangrene"

to be continued!!??

Hindustani Vegetariani Doggerel

Behold the mighty Englishman
He rules the Indian Small,
Because being a meat-eater,
He is five cubits tall.

The explanation, from "Clothing the political man: A reading of the use of khadi/white in indian public life" by Dipesh Chakrabarti, Postcolonial Studies, Vol. 4, No. 1, 2001:

Gandhi quotes [this] 'doggerel of the Gujarati poet Narmada' that was popular 'amongst the schoolboys'. The doggerel captures the colonial nationalist understanding of the role of the body in the construction of political power.

Palinode to the Five Prayers

Those five prayer poems are a set, which together will form a short illuminated book called Five Prayers. We're working on that a bit today. There's also a palinode at the end:

Palinode to the Five Prayers

The sun has been set free,
Then the poor are fed with honey cream,
And I will no longer smoke my hubbly-bubbly solitarily,
Like a pocket of railway steam,
The sun & me, booty-hunters on a merry sea.

Three Years Ago: "List"

Premiering, today--, hello readers--, I would like to spearhead the initiative for a new segment called Three Years Ago. We never properly celebrated that this website weblog has been posting for more than three years. So as an extended anniversary party, I'll be RE-POSTING from the exact past, EXACTLY TO THE MINUTE THREE YEARS LATER, the post I had posted three years ago. This post from May 27th, 2006, at 3:51pm, was simply called "List".
______________________________________________________________

1) Girls who think Sandinistra is the best Clash album.
2) Snow in May.
3) The 1976 elections.
4) Neil Diamond’s "Soulimon".
5) What Hawthorne thought of Melville.
6) A googly during a Sticky Wicket.
7) The deleted ending of Dr. Strangelove.
8) Popcorn cooked over a fire.
9) When, during the last Calvin & Hobbes anthology, Rosalyn (the babysitter) beats Calvin at Calvinball.
10) David Byrne dancing with a lamp.
11) White tea with steamed rice milk.
12) Turquoise found in the hills of the Nevada desert.
13) New York hipster drone music played at deafening volumes on the Hurdy-Gurdy.
14) Good flan.
15) Lily Langtree.
16) The names of Al Franken’s books.
17) Half Moon Lake in Desolation Wilderness.
18) Petzl Headlamps worn at inappropriate times.
19) J.D. Salinger’s longevity.
20) People who smile to themselves at you.
21) Joan Baez singing both parts of conversational songs.
22) Jokes about Sven & Ollie.
23) People who are humble about having read all of Edmund Spenser’s The Faerie Queen.
24) Sexagenarians who think The Man Who Wasn't There is the best Cohen Brothers movie.
25) Poor students who would prefer to spend more than $50 on a bottle of good tequila.
26) Mimosa’s Witnesses.
27) My friend who said she saw Wagner’s Siegfried on acid with her father.
28) John Denver’s Greatest Hits, Volume Three.
29) Children who use the word “obtuse.”
30) Life-long vegetarians.
31) Tan M&Ms in a wine glass.
32) Toughannock Falls.
33) The first few chapters of First Chronicles.
34) Houris.
35) When Elizabeth Bishop interrupts & corrects herself in her own poem.
36) Seeing an old friend in a new light.
37) Having a large number of dimes.
38) Jokes about what’s black, white, and/or red.
39) Corn Lily.
40) Shakespeare’s Troilus & Cressida.
41) Butterbeer & Firewhiskey.
42) Caleb Burhans.
43) Merlot drinkers.
44) People who take black & white photos on digital cameras.
45) Jimmy Buffet’s Jamaica Mistaica.
46) Reading Robert Burns out loud with an American accent.
47) Christmas caroling on Halloween.
48) The one who gets to play 4’33” during a John Cage Music Circus.
49) David Bowie as Andy Warhol in Basquiat.
50) Eskimo women chanting.