Department of Five Word Poems: "My five word poems total hundreds" -Hanshan, ancient Chinese poet

Our five word poems blog fivewordpoems.tumblr.com is galumphing forth at the speed of nonsense. I just happened upon this beautiful ancient Chinese poem whilst googlying the subject, by Tang dynasty poet Hanshan:

My five word poems total hundreds
Seven word seventy-nine
Three word twenty-one
Altogether maybe 600 poems
All written on ancient rocks
Boasting, my brushwork is strong
Who understands my poems
Is the mother of Buddha.

I found it on the poet's wikipedia page, "translated by Wandering Poet." The name "Hanshan" means "cold mountain," so I assume it should have a soundtrack by T-Bone Burnett. Both F. Keith Wahle & I have written hundreds each of five word poems, so we have fulfilled the first line of Hanshan, but now there is a new challenge to write 79 seven-word poems and 21 three-word poems. Our Five Word Poems Tumblr is now accepting submissions.

Today I came home to Cold Mountain
To be a hermit and forget the affairs of the world.
-Hanshan 

Mmmbop, ba duba dop
Ba du bop, ba duba dop
Ba du bop, ba duba dop
Ba du
Yeah
-Hanson

Two Tumblr Blogs: The Manna Tease & Five Word Poems

Hello. You may have noticed that itwaslost.org is updated much less frequently than in the golden era. We're not dead, and we will continue to use this ole blogger bloggity blog to log-roll and blog-roll, and occasionally post some new writing, art, or music.

However, our energies in the blogosphere are more concentrated right now at certain other projects: there's two tumblr blogs you should follow if you are a tumblererer. The first centers on music projects related to our folk duo The Manna Tease. (We've also been posting Spotify mixtapes and other delicacies in addition to our music videos, et cetera.) The address is themannatease.tumblr.com.

The second brand new tumblr blog is exclusively devoted to FIVE WORD POEMS. We published some five word poems here two years ago, inspired by the Five Word Poems of F. Keith Wahle. The new tumblr blog will post the entire series of Wahle's and mine own daily for the next year, and hopefully more to come. There is also a way to SUBMIT your own directly to the blog. Please do, if you are an aspiring five word poet. Add these new blogs to your feeds!

The Tale of Big Toothie

The Tale of Big Toothie
Comprised of Five Word Poems by Minnie Molly Mary
Photo-journalism by David Magnolia Ficke
Sangria provided by S. Sandrigon
And a Special Appearance by Darren Southworth Peoples as the outlaw Rocky "Antibiotic-Resistant" Goner-realism
Five Nights Only!
Free Hair Tonic & Cold Sore Eradication thrown in for parties of five or more.

The Tale of Big Toothie
Part I.

big toothie was a thug

he resembled a good-looking dolphin

both parents were feral mathematicians

big toothie always wore white

especially with tooth-fairy on sunday's

they would jump chain-link fences

tooth-fairy laughed at big toothie

big toothie shook his fist

"i'll get you my pretty!....

if the jellyfish don't first"

Part II.

big toothie threatened death often

fortunately the jellyfish never obliged

child services watched them constantly

Part III.

big toothie rocked the party

oftentimes his bow-tie strangled him

instead of crying he choked

this he did not like

big toothie has low tolerance

"off with this accoutrement immediately,

bow-tie's disturb the chest halo...

and this little shirt, too!"

teeth have nipples, everyone wondered?

"what do they taste like?"

tooth-fairy raised her hand first

"they taste like vegan haggis!"

Part IV.

big toothie wanted to murder her

he was a reasonable tooth

conversely, pixies were riotous cheerleaders

tooth-fairy's parents sported grog blossoms

mother wore christmas ass-less chaps

father was a rhinestone cowboy

Part V.

big toothie got a cavity

"curses to all the truffles....

beastie evil fairy perversed me

tooth fairy's had rich taste

"screw dental hygiene" says she

"WELL, it's MY calcium appendage!"

fairy's liked corrupting god's gifts

afflicted, big toothie played dead

unfortunately, sleeping gives cavities strength

being an alcoholic doesn't help

"an inevitable dr. death visit!"

Part VI.

doctor's office smelled of warthogs

dr. death wore air jordan's

his parents were tight rope hula-hoopers

his handlebar moustache was frosted

sadly the prognosis was negative

"this chunk here must go!"

(speaking of the right nipple)

"refusal would mean impending gangrene"

to be continued!!??

Department of Five Word Poems: xviii.

95.

I laughed till it hurt.
-F. Keith Wahle

xviii.

The Mastadonians conspiring against me.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xvii.

93.

Aluminum oranges came from nowhere.
-F. Keith Wahle

xvii.

My wives conspiring against me.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xvi.

89.

My elbow is on fire.
-F. Keith Wahle

xvi.

Our rainbows manufactured in Albuquerque.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xv.

83.

Sometimes, we all go naked.
-F. Keith Wahle

xv.

My wives agree on nothing.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xiv.

82.

We all go naked sometimes.
-F. Keith Wahle

xiv.

Big sillies destroyed my reputation.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xiii.

81.

No one goes home empty-handed.
-F. Keith Wahle

xiii.

The Mastadonians destroyed my reputation.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: xi.

113.

Marching bands murdered my parents.
-F. Keith Wahle

xi.

The President's wife getting filthier.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: x.

179.

Hurt people when you can.
-F. Keith Wahle

x.

Big sillies are getting filthier.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: ix.

178.

Potatoes will rule the world.
-F. Keith Wahle

ix.

The Mastadonians are getting filthier.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: viii.

177.

The penis in the vagina.
-F. Keith Wahle

viii.

Father drank himself to death.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: vii.

187.

Clothes made out of cake.
-F. Keith Wahle

vii.

The winter of our discothèque.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: vi.

186.

Shoes made out of money.
-F. Keith Wahle

vi.

Timmy Tommy doesn't like that.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: v.

142.

Big sillies attacked the villages.
-F. Keith Wahle

v.

Big sillies ate deadly snackies.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: iv.

11.

Yesterday we lost Central America.
-F. Keith Wahle

iv.

The President's wife likes me.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: iii.

10.

Today we almost lost Canada.
-F. Keith Wahle

iii.

I like the President's wife.

________________________________________________________________________________

Department of Five Word Poems: ii.

4.

Benny Goodman waving good-bye, good-bye.
-F. Keith Wahle

ii.

Screwing is easier than reading.

________________________________________________________________________________

Introducing the Department of Fivers

We have been humongously inspired by - (a friend of Mrs Smith's) - poet F. Keith Wahle's five word poems, called Fivers. The first two:

1.
Write a five word poem.

2.
O.K., now write another one.

Mr Wahle has hundreds, filling many type-written pages. Mrs Smith used them in her interpretation of artist-composer Mark Applebaum's The Metaphysics of Notation, a beautiful graphic score, in the Cantor Art Center at Stanford University this last Friday (there are different musicians interpreting the piece every Friday at noon for a year. Mrs Smith performing it is pictured in the photo below.)

You'll be happy to know that itwaslost writers have already composed dozens of new Fivers, & I am spearheading an initiative to introduce a Department of Five Word Poems at itwaslost.org. I think the format will be, amongst the other clutter this blog produces, a post every other day for several hundred days, each post with a Wahle Fiver, an itwaslost Fiver, & some accompanying artwork (either original or stolen. If the latter, the photo will link to where I got it.) So, for instance:

3.

Your telephone prose is impeccable.
-F. Keith Wahle

i.

I took my eyeballs out.

________________________________________________________________________________

Look for these posts every even numbered day! for hundreds of days to come!
& please submit more itwaslost fivers in the comments.