This Eulogy What Was Read at Charles Crocker’s Grave in Mountain View Cemetery, Oakland, California on August First, in the year Two Thousand & Ten.

In Memoriam: Charles Crocker, in whose name we announce a dolorous Fake Wake, open to the masses.

Death, as it must to all men, has come to Charles Crocker.
In commemorating & celebrating the ending of his life, we must take the good with the bad. Yes, he was an asshole, but he was a rich asshole.
Guests, in appropriate mourning garments, are invited to gather at Mountain View Cemetery in Oakland, California, where we will stroll together to his mausoleum. There we briefly eulogize the deceased (2pm!), gazing upon the beautiful bay area cityscape which he so dearly loved with his tiny, tiny heart. A small potluck picnic to follow around the back of the hill, including IRISH WAKE AMUSEMENTS. (I encourage guests perhaps, in addition to a picnic item, to bring cheap champagne &/or guinness, to make Black Velvets.)

After we are either bored with the moroseness or physically ejected by the Mountain View security, there will be a RECEPTION & AFTERPARTY at the Webb Block, the apartment of Mr J____ (1985 Ashby Ave). If you cannot make it to the cemetery (too soon?) please join us for additional beer drinking & eulogizing at this location, to go on until the resurrection of the morning.

This Eulogy What Was Read at Charles Crocker's Grave

Photographs from Sunday's waking coming soon...