Equinox: Quotes & Jokes

If we go fast enough & pull up just as we hit those rocks, we might, if we're lucky, clear the ravine & have the ride of our lives!

On the other hand, if we miss, we'll probably spend our few remaining days hooked up to machines & intravenous fluids!

It's either spectacular, unbelievable success, or crushing, hopeless defeat! There is no middle ground!

OK, there is a middle ground, but it's for sissy weasels.

-Bill Waterson, Calvin & Hobbes,
"Attack of the Deranged Mutant Kill Monster Snow Goons" (1992)


Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun...

-Mr Burns, The Simpsons, Season Six: "Who Shot Mr Burns? (Part One)" (1995)


When hawks eat pigeons, do they call it squab?

-witty thing I said at a party


Sweet thing, sweet thing,
Stepping on your violin,
Space Boy, Fly Girl,
Living in the underworld

-David Byrne, "U.B. Jesus", Look Into the Eyeball (2001)

Two fish were in a tank, & one says to the other:
"Doe anyone know how to drive this thing?"

A duck walks into a bar at happy hour & says, "Can I get some peanut butter?" And the bartender says, "No, go away, duck, we don't sell peanut butter here."
Next day, happy hour, the duck comes back & says, "Can I get some peanut butter?" And the bartender says, "No, I told you yesterday, we don't sell peanut butter. Go away, duck."
Next day, same time, happy hour, the duck comes back & says, "Can I get some peanut butter?" And the bartender, furious, says, "No! If you come here & ask for peanut butter one more time, I'm going to staple you to the wall. Go away, duck."
So, the next day, at happy hour, the duck comes back & says, "Can I get a stapler?" And the bartender says, "No, I don't have a stapler!" So, the duck says: "Okay, then can I get some peanut butter?"