Thirteen Short Run-on Movie Reviews

I haven't been fulfilling my obligations as blog movie critic, so here goes, each in one run-on sentence or less:

Tootsie: I love hanging out with Dustin Hoffman & Bill Murray, a great script & some retro feminism, unsatisfactory ending.

God Grew Tired of Us: The Lost Boys of the Sudan come to America, these kids are charming heroes, I only watched the second half.

Being There: A middle aged Peter Sellers is a cloistered retard let loose in scary Washington D.C., nothing about this movie works, cringy enough to turn it off.

John Hughes: This man directed only eight movies, from 1984 to 1991 - Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Weird Science, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Planes Trains & Automobiles, She's Having a Baby, Uncle Buck, & Curly Sue; as well as the screenplays for Pretty in Pink & Some Kind of Wonderful - Every one of those a hit or worthy in its own right. What happened to him? Since then, it seems like he's done nothing but write the screenplays for the Beethoven & Home Alone sequels. I propose a retrospective of his work to resolve this mystery.

Once Upon the Time in the West: Still breathtaking on its fifth or sixth viewing, I'm always awed at the most slow-paced movies, like this & Kubrik's, which are always gripping & stay fun for three hours.

Enchanted: If we can put our 21st Century confusion about the Disney Princess Movie on hold, this movie works as a successful lampoon of itself, held together by the charismatic heroine Amy Adams. I especially love the Central Park big song-&-dance number.

A Star Is Born (1976): Worth watching just for Barbara Streisand's outfits, but I think she made Kris Kristofferson's character too kind & sweet, it would have been more dramatic if he was crueler. Streisand is such a weird leading lady.

The Jazz Singer (1980): Neil Diamond is so great on camera, he should have done more of these flicks, the best highlight is the non-sequitorial wandering around America bit in Act Three; plus, it took me ninety minutes to recognize Laurence Olivier as Diamond's disproving Rabbi father.

Leatherheads: George Clooney's attempt to make a Coen Brothers Comedy, it's a bit forgettable but the slapstick humor is first rate, & I appreciate the glimpse into Football's shaggy beginnings.

The Visitor: Thomas McCarthy's first movie was "The Station Agent", made excellent by the superb midget actor Peter Dinklage (who recently got to date Tina Fey in 30 Rock); don't accidentally rent The Visitor, it's one long politically-correct suck-fest.

Tropic Thunder: I was pretty drunk when I watched this movie, & my friend was attacking her lover, I would definitely watch it again, wait, shit, I forgot I already reviewed this movie.

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford: It got mediocre reviews when it came out & There Will Be Blood got great press; but I declare quite uncontroversially that TWBB was overhyped melodramatic flubber & The Assassination was cool & powerful.

Iron Man: Satisfying as a hollywood movie but unsatisfying as a superhero flick, the sequel will need better car chases.

The Hallelujah Trail: My favorite epic cowboy comedy.